Sunday, August 28, 2011

waiting..and then bed!

Oeh. Things aren't nice right now. I have a lot in my mind. Maybe it's even good? Anyway, i really hoped i could talk to J tonight before i go to bed and he goes to work, but he doesn't pick up his phone and he's not on the Internet either. That sucks.
Tomorrow's gonna be a crazy day. Tough day. But thankfully J is coming home. Only nice thing about tomorrow. A very nice, actually. I am so looking forward to it.
I am so tired right now, though it's not that late. It's 9.25pm. I think i'll be up till J goes to work. Maybe he comes to net before he leaves?! And after that i'll fall asleep for sure, i know that! (I work hard to keep my eyes open right now eyelids are so heavy!). But it's worth for waiting. I hope.

Early night! :)

Friday, August 26, 2011

You make it true!

sleepy Friday

Tired. Again. I went to Tallinn early in the morning and i was back at home at 12am. I was soooo tired. I am not used to wake up so early. Anyway, at home i slept till 3 o'clock, then i read a book and then kept sleeping till 6pm. Seems that i have been sleeping most of the day!
Anyway, tomorrow i am going to pack my things and on Sunday I'm going to Tallinn coz i must wake up early on Monday. Next week is going to be fun, busy and crazy. I hope i have time to relax too. Johannes is at home, so i'll enjoy next week for sure!!!! :D I just hope this moving in to his place and unpacking my things won't take too long. I want to spend every second with him. I have to do some school stuff anyway, but luckily only in the mornings. I am so glad that 1st grade students have mostly only 4 classes a day :)
Oeh, i am right now waiting for J to come to skype. I better call him:P

Thursday, August 25, 2011

I want to hug my Prince!

I'm as tired as this cute kitty!

Good night!

My own world of books

I have been lately so tired. I have spent most of the days in my bed reading a book or just looking around the Net. I finished reading "Mini shopaholic" which was very funny book. Next i read "Minu Eesti 2" (My Estonia 2). I started with it months ago, but then i got some new books and this one was set aside. Anyway, now i managed to read it through. And after that i read "True Believer" by Nicholas Sparks. I finished with it today. It was such a good book. And now I'm reading "Peaaegu täiuslik" (Almost perfect). I decided that i should read books that are on my bookshelf and that i have bought, but never really gotten so far to read them. Anyway, as it seems last couple of days i have managed to change it. And i still have 6 more books to read :) But uni starts soon and i bet i won't have much time to read at that time. It'll be crazy busy!
Oeh, it's 9.30pm and I'm SO tired :/ I guess it's time for me to go to bed (actually i already am in my bed.Lol).
Oh, one more thing. I miss J. Surprise, surprise, huh? Well, i really am looking forward to 29th when he comes home. In the morning i have some things to do and then he can take care of me at home :) We can finally be together again! He makes me smile!


Monday, August 22, 2011

Days of love

Okay, i haven't blogged for quite a while. First of all i must say that i had sooo amazingly fun day with J on 16th Aug. We shopped a bit and then we went to an amusement park in Helsinki. OMG! It was so awesome, scary, crazy and much more! I seriously enjoyed every second with J! It was just a perfect way to celebrate our 1 year anniversary!
I would have never believed that i had gone to American Mountains and loads of other scary rides. But i did! And it was so much fun! When J is next to me I'm not scared. He protects me :)

Anyway, after that wonderful day we took a boat back to Estonia. Then we did lots of shopping the next day. We bought a new bed, a closet, curtains and lots of other smaller things. Our bedroom is almost ready! We only need to buy me a desk where i can study.
But we also had fun when J was here. We went to the movies twice, we watched the last part of Harry Potter and a movie Captain America. We also had dinners out and so on.
Now J is back in Finland and i am counting the days till he gets back!!!! When he's coming back we'll finally move my things to his apartment! And then I'm officially living there :)
I'm so glad that he can be in Estonia for a week. I love spending time with my love!
Oh, my university starts soon. I am actually pretty excited. But i have to wake up pretty early coz classes start at 8:15am already. I'll get to used to it, I'm sure :)
But right now i want to enjoy the last weeks of my summer holiday! :)

Monday, August 15, 2011


I am finally in Finland with Johannes. I can finally hold him, talk to him, joke with him, laugh with him, hug and kiss him. I missed him SO much! He's the best guy and the most important to me! I love him from the bottom of my heart.
Pretty much is going on lately, but i try to hold on to what's the most important. Even if you have some decisions to make, you have problems or doubts, in the end everything goes how it has to go. Life's beautiful. And our happiness in in our own hands. I love J soooo much and i am very very very very happy with him! No matter what! And i want him to be happy!
Tomorrow we are going to Helsinki to Linnanmäki amusement part! We are going to celebrate our 1 year anniversary. It's going to be much fun. We can spend the whole day together having fun. i am absolutely waiting for it. And later at night we are going back to Estonia because we have some things to do in next two days. I am so glad J has some days off from work. I hope we can go to the movies and have fun. We haven't done that in Estonia for a while.
Oh, it's SOOOO good to be back from the dancing camp. It was fun, but 2 weeks felt like 2 months :/ I was going crazy. I missed J just so much. But now i am with him and i won't be away from him for so long anymore!!!!!!!!

Much love,


Friday, August 12, 2011


YESSSSS!!!!! It's my last night here!!!!Yay! I'll get home tomorrow and I'll get to see J a day after tomorrow. O'boy i haven't been so excited for ages! I miss him like crazy!

PS! I am SO happppppy :)

Thursday, August 11, 2011

day after tomorrow!

I want to HUG you!

Beautiful songs makes me feel good. Knowing that a day after tomorrow I'm going home makes me feel even more good. I am seriously counting every hour. Yeah, i miss home that bad. lol. Nope, actually i miss J!
Today has been pretty fun day. Quite usual too. We just had dinner and knowing that we won't get to eat till tomorrow morning, makes us all so anxious.
Miss Jane has let me listen to some very very good songs! Now i have new favorites. We have pretty similar taste of music. Spanish music!

PS!I love you too much for words!

I am craving for fruits! Especially for strawberries!!!!!

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Love, oh Love!

I am breathless! I really am. I don't know how to express what i am feeling right now. It's pure happiness! It's impossible to describe. I love him from the bottom of my heart. And it makes me feel so special to know that our love is so strong and we both mean a world to each other! He's my Prince Charming who i met a year ago and i absolutely melted...i just fell in love with him. So easily. How couldn't I? He's so sweet, so smart, so handsome, with the biggest heart ever! I feel so safe with him. He makes my life complete! My love is endless :)


He makes me happy :)

:) Happy!
I talked to J and he put a smile on my face! :) He always does! He makes me feel so warm and he's so positive. I felt so far from hi, but now i feel he's so close. He Is! Because he's in my heart! I am looking forward to Sunday more than i have ever looked forward to anything else i think. Being apart from him for two weeks is TOO LONG! It may sound stupid, but that's how i feel. I'm in love. I am crazy about my man! And he's my One and Only! My Prince! :)


So sensitive. I must carefully choose my words, because i never know how he reacts or what he reads out of it. I don't quite understand why he is like that.. i think he doesn't know how hard it is for me. I don't recognize him, and that's one main reason why i want to be with him. I need to know what's wrong and i need to fix it. I try so hard to be the best for him!

A little sad


It's Tuesday. It means there are only 4 more days till the camp ends. Yesterday we have a long day and night. It started raining and thundering at night, so i woke up once at 4am. The lightening was pretty bad.
But now its morning and although the weather is rainy, sun is shining.
I must keep working.. entertaining children :P


Monday, August 8, 2011


My stomach hurts coz i worry. But right now i shouldn't worry at all. Any stress don't do good to me :/ But i can't help. I just don't understand it. I wish i could do something to make things okay. I want it to be fine again. I need him to support me, to be here for me. To make me laugh. To say sweet things to me.
I know eventually it'll happen. Coz i know he cares. But i just don't know why he acts like that right now :( It makes me being away from him so much harder!

Miss you!

I have a wish..

I wish someone could make things normal again, like they should be. I wish that everything was okay. It's so hard if I'm alone and i keep trying make things fine, but it seems so worthless. But i keep trying. Because i care.

PS! I need YOU!

Monday...5 more days!

Gosh! I'm so tired. And i am counting days till Saturday! I want to go home, unpack and again repack my bag and then go to Finland on Sunday! I want it so bad!!! I miss J! :(

Sunday, August 7, 2011

what's wrong?..i don't know :(

I wish i knew what was wrong. But i don't. And it makes me feel so sad coz he's so different. And it hurts that he doesn't talk to me. It makes my day and night harder. I just hope that a new day will make his mood shine again. Like he usually is - my sunshine!

Miss him!

Saturday, August 6, 2011

My One and Only!

For yesterday's memories, today's love, and tomorrow's dreams I love you.

The more I know you, the more I love you.

I Love you with the breath, the smiles and the tears of all my life.

a year since i met J :)

Today is on 6th August. Exactly year ago i met Johannes! It was the best day of my life! I am sooooo happy that i made a decision to go to Finland. I can't imagine what my life would look like right now if i hadn't met J. He's my Prince. He's my everything. I love him from the bottom of my heart! Always & forever!

I love you, J!

Friday, August 5, 2011

Dancing camp!!!

I am at ballroom dancing camp. It's my 7th day here, and 8 more to go :P I get back home on 13th August night. I cannot wait! Mostly coz i miss J and i want to BE with him, not only see him from the webcam and hear his voice from the phone. I want to BE with my love!
The camp has been really fun actually. I just wish J was here. But only 8 more days and then on 14th Aug im going to Finland :) Cannot wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then i can hung out and just be with J! whoe! he must be ready for me.. i am going to talk a lot and hug a lot and kiss a lot!!! :D

I can't wait to go home to you!
Love is the most amazing feeling in the whole world. I feel so blessed and i am incredible happy that i can love someone so amazing and special as Johannes!

PS! I am so hungry all the time. LOL. Chocolate is still my really good friend :D